Missing him...

This crazy class and work schedule has me a day late with this one. But yesterday did not go without lots of memories, tears and thinking...

It seems quite unreal to me that an entire 365 days have passed since I got that call while going over the George Washington bridge in NYC heading down to Georgia. I will never forget the complete and total shock I was in. Flying out to Utah to be with Gar’s family was the most important choice I made. It allowed me to be close to Gar, it allowed me a feeling of peace and it allowed me to be close to his amazing family. For the first time I knew he was at peace. A lot has changed in my life since then. It has been a whirlwind of a year. I have so many great memories of Gar. I could write a novel. His mannerisms and little quirks made me love him that much more. He left a gaping hole in my heart that no one will able to be able to fill, nor do I want anyone to. Yesterday, more than most days, I thought a lot about those memories. Of course, I allowed myself time to grieve but I wanted to focus more on the positives rather than the negative feelings. We shared so much together and for that I am extremely lucky. Gar, as he did for many people, taught me a ton. He taught me to love unconditionally, he taught me to be strong, he taught me to be myself, he taught me the feeling of true love. Gar touched my life in a way I can’t quite explain. I know he is up there smiling down on all of us, I know he loves us all and I feel that love every single day. I am so thankful for the time I was able to spend with Gar, the memories we were able to make and the love we got to share. He truly changed my life and because of him I will never ever be the same. I love you Gar!